Calming The Muse

the muse

“she thought that maybe she was wrong–“


“but when she looked into his eyes, she–”


WHAT? I’m working here!

Would you mind not talking to me right now?

I just have to get this thought out–

I’m driving, Muse. And I don’t have a voice recorder because I can’t stand the sound of my own voice so anything you say just floats around in my brain.

And this is my problem?


Look, you’re the one who slapped me around until I woke up again. I was having a great time fat-assing on the sofa. And now, here I am, up and running, and you want me to be quiet?

It’s just — WHOA! Deer!


Look, I can’t concentrate on my driving when you’re talking to me. And since you already ran me ragged this morning, I’m late for work.

Work, shmirk. What’s more important, work or me?

You’re important. Very — YIKES! POTHOLE! *bounce, bounce, bounce*

Would you watch it? That took out my kidneys!

Muse, I like talking to you. I love talking to you. But can we please, please, please, PLEASE not talk right now?

Sure. How about I make you forget everything I was just saying and refuse to repeat it?

No!  *clears throat* I will remember everything the Muse says when I have time to write it down.  I will remember everything the Muse says–

What the hell is that?

It’s called positive thinking.

*snort* Please.  Like that’s going to work.

Okay. *deep breath* Can we both just calm down here?

I’m calm. I’m freaking calm. I’m so calm I’m going to shut up…. FOREVER!

NO! Please no. But if you could– AHHHH! “Sorry Ma’am!”

*chortle* Wow. That old lady gave you the finger.

Oh, for heaven’s…  *clears throat* *hehhh hummm* *sings* Go to sleep…go to sleep….go to sleep little Musie…

Oh, come on.

*still singing* Go to sleep…go to sleep…and talk to me la-ter…

That’s so *yawn* lame

*croons* Go to sleep, little Muse and talk to me at the ‘puter…

I guess I am a little tired *knuckles eyes*

*warbles into higher range* Go to sleep, little Musie…shut up for riiiiight now…


Thank God.

*drives in silence*

What was she saying again? It was…no…wait. What was it!?!



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