First Steps

dizzy computerPreviously on Betsy’s Blog…

Betsy met an albino gerbil named Harry, who just happens to be her official Guide for her Quest. The problem? She didn’t know what her Quest was! Although Harry was disgusted by this lack of self-awareness, he helped her weed through her writing goals to see what she really wants to accomplish. With Harry’s help, Betsy realized she wants to self-publish (or indie publish, if you will).

But where does she go from here? This question has been haunting Betsy for days – nay, weeks. Let’s join Betsy and Harry in Betsy’s brain as they discuss the first steps.

*whirr, whirr, whirr, whirr*

Harry, get off that damn wheel and come talk to me. *Betsy frowns over at the huge gerbil habitat with its various turrets and towers* *she sits down on the large sofa and spreads some papers out on the coffee table* And turn off ESPN. We need to talk.

Jeeze, I’m right here, doll. *pant, pant* Can’t we talk after my *pant* workout?

No. *Betsy picks up a stack of printouts neatly stapled together* *leafs through the papers*

Crap. Okay. *Harry jumps nimbly off wheel to the top of a tower* *picks up towel laying there and drapes it around his neck* *wipes face* What’s up?

Now that I know I want to be an indie author, there’s so freaking much to learn! *Betsy holds up wads of papers in both hands* I mean, look at all of this! There’s so much information!

Yeah? Let’s see. *Harry jumps off tower onto arm of sofa and scrambles over to crouch on coffee table* *peers down at papers* Hmmm Uh huh. Okay.

See what I mean? *Betsy fists hands in her hair and pulls* What the heck am I supposed to do first?

*Harry squints up at her* What do you mean?

What do I mean! *Betsy gets up and begins to pace rapidly around brain* I mean, do I build my author platform? Or sign up with a publicity firm? How do I market? How are ebooks formatted? What about cover art? Do I hire somebody? Do I try to do it myself? How do you even use Photoshop? Do I try to upload the book to all of the different platforms or do I hire somebody else to do it or use an aggregator? How do I find an editor? How????

Easy now.

*Betsy whirls to confront Harry* And what about visibility, for God’s sake! WHAT ABOUT VISIBILITY!

Whoa. *Harry holds up paws in a placating gesture* You’re scaring me a little bit. First of all, breathe. In…and out…

*Betsy gulps at air* Okay.

Now. Sit down. *Harry jumps over to the sofa and pats the cushion*

*Betsy sits* Okay.

I’m your freaking Guide, right? I’m helping you out on this freaking Quest, right?

*Betsy breathes* Right.

Damn right. So, tell me. How many books do you have finished?  Like ready to go.

Now?

No. Next year. Yeah, now.

*Betsy thinks* Um…one. And another book is almost finished.

Great, great. *Harry rolls his eyes* So, what exactly are you thinking you’re going to be publishing?

Now?

YES! NOW!

Um…hmmm… *Betsy thinks* Well, the book that’s done is already published… *Betsy thinks* Umm…I guess…nothing?

RIGHT! So, it seems to me that maybe, just maybe, just possibly right at the moment you should be concentrating on finishing a SECOND FREAKING BOOK and not on any of that other crap.

*Betsy thinks* Finish…the book? Huh. First?

YES! FINISH THE DAMN BOOK!

Before I worry about publishing?

YES! YES! YES! *Harry jumps up and down, flailing his little fists in the air*

*Betsy thinks* But finishing the books is kind of…hard.

*Harry takes a deep breath* *settles back on sofa* I know it is, doll.

And the Muse has been sleeping an awful lot lately.

So maybe you need to wake her up.

*Betsy thinks* Wake up the Muse. And… write?

*Harry wipes sweat from brow* Damn this is exhausting. YES!

*Betsy thinks* Huh. Well….if you’re sure….

I’m freaking sure!

And you don’t think I need to find an editor?

Not until the book is finished.

*Betsy thinks* And you ARE my Guide.

Trust me, doll.

I do. *Betsy straightens shoulders* Okay. I’ll do it. I’ll WRITE!

Great. *Harry jumps to coffee table* *picks up very tiny mai tai* *sips* Now we can get started.

*Betsy blinks at him* Started? Whatever do you mean?

 

To be continued…

 

Gerbil-image-05

 
 

Share

Speak Your Mind

*

Notify me of followup comments via e-mail. You can also subscribe without commenting.