Happy Day

So, today is my birthday. It’s one of those “milestone” birthdays that you either try to ignore, or celebrate intensely to dull the pain.

I’ve gone into a very thoughtful time approaching this birthday, and that’s good. Every once in a while it’s good to look at where you are and where you’re going. It’s just a shame we tend to wait until we’re older to do it. I had so much more energy to deal with this sort of thing when I was twenty.

By the way, I am not turning twenty for my milestone birthday. In case you were wondering.

If you’re like me, you know what you want to do, but you forget that you probably should do it sooner rather than later. Then you hit a “milestone” birthday and reality comes crashing down upon you as you realize how little you’ve actually accomplished. Until the digits click to a new decade, you can forget there’s a time limit on this wacky little thing we call life. When you remember, you can get depressed.

But I’m going to share a secret I’ve been coming to realize over these past few thoughtful days.

As I move into the next year of my life, I do not have to be the way I have been up to now. I am not written in stone. I don’t have to be bound by the same old ways of thinking and acting. I don’t have to remain at the mercy of the same fears and anxieties. I can re-imagine myself, if need be. I might have established a draft of my life, but I can revise it, if revisions are necessary. If I want to, I can be different than who I have been.

I’m beginning to realize that I am not trapped. I have the freedom to change.

Which makes this a very, very happy day. And a “milestone” birthday.

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Comments

  1. Valerie Watts Eichlin says:

    Ah! Happy Birthday Betsy! This has been a weird year. Turning 50. I am still in denial – I mean, like how did I get to be 50? Some days I feel soooo old and some days I feel like I’m fighting against aging.

    Don’t change too much …..

    • Betsy Horvath says:

      @Valerie Watts Eichlin: Thanks, Val! It has been very, very strange. It seems like high school was just a minute ago, but I work with people who weren’t born until years after we graduated. Then I say “what did I do with the time? Where did it go?” It’s been a little surreal. LOL

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